Numb, Numb, Numb

Well, everything is crap and that is putting it in a kind way. My mom filed for divorce and things really suck. I have so many emotions but am just kind of walking around in this weird state. I don't understand a lot of it and it's hard for me to understand when 38 years are involved and there's no attempt to talk it out. I am trying so hard not to judge, pick sides, not get caught in the middle, and just be there. But, it's so hard. I always have looked at my parents with complete admiration for their longevity in marriage and their relationship. I thought, "wow, if they can still be sweethearts after 30 years, things are possible." It's hard and no one is perfect and no marriage is perfect but you WORK! I want the best for them both but just don't get it. I feel as though the one time in my life when I am settled with a child is the one time you want everything intact and happy and it's not. Lots of tears are being shed and not much else to say.

Randomness

It's Friday, I will finally have a real person to talk to for the next 2 days besides Reis and Brutus.

I think my husband is 27 going on 65. He poured a scotch(which he did not drink) and smoked a cigar last night on the back porch...made me laugh.

My ipod died and I am using that as an excuse to not go to the gym. I CANNOT work out without it. Thank goodness for my booty I have a new one being delivered on Monday.

There are way too many skinny biatchs living in our complex...more of a reason my ipod needs to get here

I got a stroller citation for leaving it at the bottom of the stairs. When you have a good 20 pounder on your hip, it is easily forgotten. Guess I can't blame them though, that's why everything looks so nice. Stroller citation...makes me laugh too.

4.5 Hours of Pure Bliss

The husband did really well for my first Mother's Day and got lots of brownie points. He bought me a massage, facial, mani and pedi from an Aveda Salon down here. I cannot WAIT to use it. I think I shall go this weekend and use the massage and facial. It was really sweet, and he knows things have been rough these past couple of weeks. So, his attempt to make me feel better and loved worked...kudos for him!
We are finally settled pretty much and Alan's job is going well. I have been spending some days at the pool so I can't complain a bit and the weather is wonderful. Everything for us has fallen into place; it just seems like the world around me is crashing down. I am trying not to dwell on it and just praying that things will be okay.

Almost forgot but only for a second

Here are the pics from Reis' first haircut. We passed through Auntie Sarah's on our way to St. Pete so he could get a little trim. I didn't want to do it, but it was all in his ears and eyes.

Thank you

Just wanted to say thank you for all the comments. It's nice to be able to ramble and have a little feedback. Life is so weird sometimes and crazy...I don't understand. My dad has moved some of his stuff out and is staying with his mom. To think about that makes me sad. I tell myself that maybe this is necessary and might help in the long run. One can only hope. Anyway, thank you. Hopefully my blogs will get a little more cheerful and not so freakin depressing...sorry:(

A glimpse at my soul...my heart is hurting

I probably will get this off my chest and then take it down...not sure if I should air all our business but writing this helps me. I am in a daze and hurting so bad because my parents have decided to separate for a while...divorce hasn't come up and I'm taking all the positives I can at the moment. To be on the phone and listen to your father crying and hysterical doesn't make for a good Sunday. It's the same way with my mom, but dad is taking it MUCH harder. I hate it all and am just kind of in a blurred state. Lots of prayer is needed.

Still here

I am still kicking. We finally got our place and moved in. The movers decided to show up last night at 10:30 when they called and were supposedly on their way at 10:30 that morning. They left this morning at 3:30 and I woke up around 8 to the sound of fire alarm tests in our building. Needless to say, I am exhausted and there is crap everywhere! At least my clothes are in my closet and the frig is full...and I have some wine. Will blog more when I don't feel like I have been ran over.